News
If the Cowfolk are doing it, this is where it’s at…
The Master Plan
31/05/2012
The 20/20 Cup team were spanked by Whitchurch 1st Team. The full scorecard can be seen here.
02/06/2012
The Saturday Team beat Avonside by 27 runs. The full scorecard can be found here and the report goes thus:
This week the foe was Avonside, a side renowned for flinging the bat at everything and thus getting out quickly. Hugh, our host at Windford, informed us that he had a twinge in his duodenum which could only mean one thing: heavy rain at 6pm. This was vital information because to get a result from a rain affected match 20 overs must be completed in the second innings, 6pm would be more or less the time at which we would get to that point in the game. Once the match is abandoned if the team batting second have a run rate greater than the net run rate they win. If they are below the net run rate they lose. If the run rates are the same to three significant figures the result is settled with fisty cuffs in the gypsy manner. But if their score is a prime number, regardless of run rates, there is sherry all round in the Anglican manner, the match is drawn and phone numbers are exchanged.
So, Plan A was to win the toss, get them into bat, get them out in 30 or so overs for about 130 and this would set a low required run rate and it would be easy to have enough runs on the board when the rain arrived. The worst thing that could happen would be that we batted first, not score enough runs leaving their slogging batsmen a low run rate; 20 overs would then not be enough time to bowl them out and they would win.
With this in mind Gibbo lost the toss in the usual manner and the foe put us into bat… bugger.
So Plan B was to put loads of runs on the board, set a high run rate and then bully the foe with great bowling and keep them behind the run rate, they would then self-destruct and with them thrashing around we would take awesome catches and send them home to mummy in the defeated manner.
Unfortunately one of our bowling heroes from last week was missing, Garnier had been grounded, apparently he had failed the pre-flight checks because there was too much play in his undercarriage. Luckily Gibbo had bumped into Preece and his mate Ray O’Really on Friday night. Gibbo had met O’Really once before at indoor nets and knew he had a liking for sherry. Selected! More importantly though Preece had been round to Garnier’s house to get the beer. The foe also reported team trouble: one of their bowlers was still making his way to the ground, lost somewhere in darkest Somerset.
With one eye on the barometer, one on Hugh’s duodenum and another on the sky Preece and Grove strode out to bat in the manly manner. Plan B.1 was put into operation; this is where Grove and Preece get off to a slow and steady start and get to 10 overs without losing a wicket. Surprisingly Plan B.1 actually worked and reaching 10 overs with 23 runs on the board our brave boys decided it was time to accelerate (Plan B.2) and hit the next over for 9 runs. Paying absolutely no attention to this Gibbo scribbled a note on a piece of paper and sent it to the middle. It read:
“Time to get a move on now. Lots of love, Skipper.”
Grove, incensed, turned to the pavilion and in the English manner waved two figures in the Skipper’s direction, he then hit the first ball of the next over for 4 and repeated the gesture. At the end of the over the batsmen had a conference, Grove said to Preece: “You bat carefully, I am going to bat like a twat”. Failing to putting Plan B.2.1 into operation Preece was stumped of a full toss in the next over. Gibbo strode to the crease with Plan B.2.2, this was to run poor asthmatic Grove into the ground.
Dear reader, what happened next was an obscene crime against humanity; with the field pushed out and both batsmen failing to hit boundaries Gibbo forced Grove to run on everything in the very humid conditions. The foe laughed as Grove wheezed and gurned his way through to the drinks break but no matter how cruel Plan B.2.2 was the runs accumulated quickly. Not long after drinks Grove gave a tiered swipe at one outside the off stump and was caught by the keeper. On returning to the pavilion he was informed that he was guilty of jug avoidance because he was out on 48.
With Toole at number 4 the Saturdays look like a much more balanced team and it was time for Plan B.2.3; let Toole, Iggy and Kahlu pile the runs on. This part of the plan started well and Gibbo and Toole were looking good, tall Toole had on his Albion sun hat and Gibbo sported baggy cerise at a jaunty angle, which silenced the foe. In the face of mediocre bowling and with such stunning head gear the scoreboard ticked over nicely and with 150 at the 30 over mark more than 230 looked possible coonsidering there were only 2 wickets down. Time for Plan B.2.3; the batting collapse in the Cowboys manner. This part of the plan seemed to be triggered by Garnier and his daughters (Our Oar and Agamemnon) arriving at the ground.
Gibbo was bowled for 32 and Toole was caught by an impressive low catch by the only fielder not on the boundary who was at cover point, he had 34. Iggy followed in a similar fashion for 1. Kahlu was caught at long on for 6. O’Really was bowled for a golden duck on debut; this is called a Right Royal Cock-Up within cricketing circles. Poor O’Really was probably wishing that he had never admitted liking sherry in the first place. With 2 LBWs and another catch the Cowboys limped to 188 all out in 38 overs.
As the players reached the pavilion for Iggy’s tea the foe’s missing bowler arrived. Strictly speaking he should not be allowed to bat, but Gibbo was too soft and said he could bat down the order as long as he would join him for a nice sherry after the game and they exchanged phone numbers. The foe’s captain not only had the bowler’s phone number already but he was also made of sterner stuff and suggested that they should toss for it and then lost. The foe were thus down to 10 batsmen.
This score was not enough when the rain and run rate situation was taken into account. The Cowboys would have backed themselves to bowl out the foe given 40 overs but to keep sloggers below 4.7 an over for 20 overs would be difficult. Time for Plan B.3 bowl superbly and catch everything. Half of this plan went well. RobT1 and Budge kept the foe’s opening pair pinned down, one of whom averaged 87 last season with a top score of 147 not out. It was great bowling indeed to get this run machine out for 17, bowled by Budge charging down the hill.
The foe’s number 3 was an eccentric player, he swished at everything and connected with nothing in the hay maker manner, hence their run rate dropped and dropped until it was well below 3. It was a slight shame therefore to get him out. Higgy then got the other opener, as Filton put it on Twitter:
“Doink! Higgy strikes again. The competent opener suffers a brain fart and plays around a straight one. 3-71 off 23 chasing 180 odd. Game on.”
With only three wickets down and well below the run rate the foe’s batsmen met between overs and decided to go for it. The very next over they were both dropped off skiers. If our brave boys had held these catches the match would have been over very quickly. The foe’s umpires steadfastly refused to give LBWs and in all 4 high catches were put down in the crap manner and it looked like all was lost as the run rate climbed steeply. It was therefore a bit of a shock when Grove stuck his hand up at backward point to ask to go to the toilet and found the ball in it. After this catch the wickets came quickly and when Gibbo bowled their top scorer the game had swung towards the Cowboys. As the rain started Preece held onto the only high catch of the innings and the foe were all out (9 wickets) for 161 in the 38th over.
RobT2 had an impressive 8 overs for only 18 runs. TT got 2 late wickets, Iggy had three wickets and Gibbo, despite being expensive, got 2 vital wickets. Budge had perhaps got the most important wicket.
After the match Hugh admitted that it was probably his jejunum and not his duodenum that had the twinge, which accounted for the fact that the rain was an hour later than expected.
MOM was Grove for his wheezing and he also won the Cider Moment for his reaction catch.
After the game our brave boys enjoyed a beer at the ground and then went back to a building site for more beer.
03/06/2012
Both Sunday games were won by the weather.
Next Tournament Meeting
Be there.
Skullduggery by the Sea
So the tournament now has a name: “Skullduggery by the Sea”.
There is much talk about portaloos, marquees and catering but there is still much to do. If you would like to help out get to the next meeting which is on Monday 11th June at 7:15pm in Hawks Gym.
There are a few fun fundraisers coming up including Fancy-Dress-5-A-Side on June 9th, a Casuals/Cowgirls night TBC and some sort of bumper raffel thing.
Some other exciting news (reach for ventolin, then ritalin, then ketamine) is that the Cowboys book is due out in time for the tournament. If anyone thinks that they might have revealed one too many skeletons from their closets they should get in contact Will and ask to have their name changed.
Fancy Dress 6-A-Side
This is a family day out with a mens and womens football, plus some childrens football. We have a BBQ, cream teas, peddle powered smoothies.
Solar scaletrix, Plus a cocktail boat. The idea of the day is to raise money for our tournament. Plus support a local energy group who need to spread the word regarding
Energy saving benefits. Thanks to support from players who feel they want to contribute to the fundraising. We now have 6 mens teams
Peace as set a challenge to the ultras to play in dresses, finish with a best legs comb. If you want to enter a team please hurry contact Nige walker.
Kas is organising a cowboys team please contact him if you wish to play. Womens team good chance to test some of the new players, and hopefully recruit more players.
All money raised goes to the tournament so please get along and support this event. This is not as originally thought a 50s v 40 etc but a chance for all to play some football and enjoy
Some food, drinks then watch the start of Euro 2012 after in the new plough. Help will be needed on the day so please let me know if you are around.
Cowboys At The M-Shed
We have been given twenty FREE tickets for the Bristol Urban Sport opening event which is on this coming Friday 1st June. Each ticket invites two people.
If you would like a ticket email back to me ( ormy@blueyonder.co.uk ) and I’ll hold it for you. Strictly first come first served.
John Carlos
John Carlos, famous as one of the athletes who gave black power sa-lutes at the 1968 Olympics, re-cently said “My life has not been about winning medals, it’s about being a freedom fighter.” John Carlos is coming to Bristol to speak out against the English De-fence League, who want to bring their message of hate and to march in Bristol on July 14th.
John Carlos has spoken out against racism and prejudice at many fo-rums around the world. Come and hear what he has to say and join the campaign to oppose the EDL in Bristol
MALCOLM X CENTRE 141 City Road, BS2 8YH FRIDAY JUNE 1ST 7.00pm
Rose Green Is Hot
29/05/2012
Ev reports from last night’s 20/20 league match. It goes thus:
Nice merry little crowd up at Rose Green in the evening sunshine for this one.
Cowboys batted first on a rock hard road of a strip and openers Ben and Neil had put on a respectable 33 after first 5 overs.
Following a flurry of wickets things looked pretty sketchy at 65 for 5 in the 11th.
However, we had recovered to 154 for 7 by the end, due to Mackies plucky 42 not out and Neils solid 30, backed up by an IPL inspired 20 from Jeff O, an express 12 runs from Omar and some expert comedy running between the wickets from Garnier.
Great opening bowling from Budge (accurate with only 11 runs conceded) and Omar (really fucking fast, finishing with 2-11), put the skids on the foe early.
Then, superb glovework from the fertile plumber and a nice spell of RT2s short of a length stuff created enough pressure to effectively put the game beyond Hope Chapel halfway through their innings.
Andy C chipped in with 2 wickets, Omar took 2 safe catches in the deep and despite Tall Dave, (Hopes skipper) scoring a mostly flawless 51 the opposition could only muster 104 for 5, with Omar taking a wicket in the final over in fading light with some surprise off spin.
Cowboys won by 50 runs.
Thanks to Pagey for umpiring.
Beyond the Cowboydome
27/05/2012
Dunc has sent the match report fot the Sunday 1st by semaphore. It reads thus (full scorecard):
It can be said of tosses that some are good to win, some to lose. In 80 degrees, we think good to win, particularly against a 10 man Harptree side on a bouncy looking Frenchay track with merely the odd vestige of green.
We batted and Neil and Justin toddle off from the shade neath the hastily fashioned tarp attached to and potentially demolishing bits of the shed/pavilion/changing room/smoking lounge. Various Cowboys grab an assortment of duties such as scoring, umpiring and facetious commentary amid rizla origami. Bolts got off to a flyer, looking confident and cutting through inviting cover gaps. Justin looked a little out of form, mixing chips into the air with drives to bowler and fielders who duly helped our cause by dropping them. There were some disputes about stumpings with more than one umpire. Harptree were beginning to wilt and didn’t look like competing with enough verve to stop Bolts from plundering at least a half century when Neil’s wallet started talking to him from a 50 yard range and he was out caught on 46. Alas. He was going very well. Enter Mark and his wile.
The gaps were gappy and Mark just kept finding them. Justin was slowly accumulating form and runs, but not without the odd airy scary moment. But when he was caught at the wicket immediately after reaching 50, skippy ordered a line-up change and sent Omar in to dent some willow. Fair enough, but Omar uncharacteristically didn’t hit a first ball boundary, though not through lack of effort.
He became the eventual stumping victim we’d all been waiting for, making way for RT2, also promoted for a quick thrash. Mark fell 10 short of a jug having been bowled, replaced by your very own scribe. Rob obliged his captain with a 12 ball 17, unluckily bowled by a looping full toss off his lower leg whilst swiping with murderous intent. Harptree just couldn’t quite get control, but neither were Easton really driving home a distinct advantage. That is until Matt Caven was unleashed.
I watched from the other end as a number of full tosses were powerfully smitten to the leg side boundary, and with a fortunate drop and field-bisecting jam, joined in with increasing confidence even if too many shots aimed directly at long off despite sarcastic jeering and advice from the New Cowboydome end. Matt was bowled for a very nifty 25 by a good swinging delivery at which he had a right good swing himself.
Last week’s hero Andy replaced him, but was involved in yet another mid-pitch mix up and very unselfishly placed his own head on the block for 3. Jeff cunningly thick-edged a nice boundary, grabbed a single and yours truly totally missed the last ball. The healthy total was 256.
We had, from memory, scored 93 from the last 10 overs.
Tea was taken amid positive tales from Trent Bridge. Many sandwiches are available.
I helped by washing up which gained me an extra portion of cake. Oh Good Egg!!
Omar began with a remarkably well preserved ball from the top end, aided and abetted by the most squat of his father figures. What an unlikely duo!
Harptree began batting as they approached bowling, not too well and without any real passion. The openers bat edges saw most of the ball as it flitted past at close proximity. In the 4th over, one ball got the thickish tickle deserved by an outswinger, and though it appeared to be past his right ear, Jeff stuck out a gloved hand and plucked it from the gap between himself and Mark at slip. Truly wonderful reaction catch.
One down, eight to go. There were left handers to bowl at and both bowlers did well, virtually no runs from the bat. Rob replaced Omar, Martin took up the challenge from the Dome end. Stoic resistance but minimal aggression was used to repel them both. RT2 began his haul, his first being another classy catch this time at gully by a forward diving Matt. The run rate, so painfully slow, began to improve once Harptree’s keeper entered the fray at no 6. He exercised patience, then flat-batted cuts through backward point.
There were also flashes which looked as though they may produce edges. Lo and behold, one did and though it had been predicted.. Oops! Butterfingers! Not easy but it was unfortunately dropped at fly slip.
The shy turtlehead of aggression retreated back to it’s shell after a Taylor delivery cracked agonizingly into an elbow.
Dean into the attack, a nice change of pace bringing him the oppo skipper’s wicket. He had scored just 7 by this point. An absolute rout looked on the cards until by far the biggest chap on today’s field of play came to the crease and as may have been expected went straight on the attack. Was there to be a twist in this tale?
Only temporarily did this possibility arise, Justin snapping a catch at short cover from RT2. The big man was gone.
The Cowboys rolled on with Andy, reluctant to bowl without a cap it seems, got into the act with a timely successful LBW shout. This brought a young’n to the crease and a returning Omar bowled nice and slow so he could lob it into the air for RT2 to snaffle. One to go, but try as we all did, there was no removing the last pairing, their keeper/batsman just having time to get to 50.
And so it ended, late, echoing with straining backs and creaking limbs, in a substantial runs victory.
One couldn’t help think though that some tiny moral sub-plot win had been gained by a genuinely understrength side keeping a jolly decent attack at bay. Sub-plot wins don’t put points on the board.
This writer will look forward to the return game under the amiable roll of the Mendip Hills, hosted by one of our oldest and most friendly of foes.
beaver patrol sunday twos match report
27/05/2012
The Sunday 1st Team beat Harptree Villages 2nds by 129 runs. The full scorecard is here.
The Sunday 2nd Team lost to Backwell Flax Bourton CC 2nd Team by 7 wickets. The full scorecard is here. Tinx reports thus.
Cricket can be a game of misfortune and pain, a freakshow in blistering conditions with humiliation only ever one ball away.
Friendships won and lost, money squandered, reputations destroyed………
There is also a downside
In crazy heat with much admiration of female fashion along the way we arrive in Flax Bourton…man it’s nice. A large ground providing 20 different wickets across the square, the possibility of a straight 6 into a bus on the main road, long boundaries, flat wickets and those (different) pesky kids again.
Most 2nd or 3rd teams we face contain kids guided and coached by the older generation of their club. It is good to see and should I ever be daft enough to live in the sticks, particularly with family, I would not hesitate to join in.
It has to be said that being beaten by able and willing youth (calm down gimp) is better than beating untalented youth (i said calm down).
We won the toss! Our chosen openers strode out, the captain’s theory and faith. Grant and Nellie.. I’m umpiring. First bowler a lefty, quick. Bowling over the wicket from as wide as is legal to basically first slip. Gotta wide him. 3 in the first over. He tweaks it, from pitching middle hitting slip to pitching middle and passing off stump by millimeters.
Mr Boycott (Grant) never looks back, doesn’t blink. He knows where his off stump is.
Last week I implied a work in progress. This week I can verify progress…. and determination. 36 overs the man batted as we crawled towards 128 for 6, batting the 40. Honourable mention’s go to other players as the man of the match nominations confirm.
It was a pleasure to play on a surface like that. Grant, attracting Boycott comparisons from the opposition played well, the coaches in the club only need to grab him to teach and install the confidence for an off drive and we will lose him to a first team.
Man it was hot.
So 128. Not enough. 50 60 runs short on a pitch like that. BUT…we did well to get there and see the overs out. Alex, Wayne, Dave H, Stroddy understood their job and stuck the last 50 runs on the board.
Alfie opened our attack, the opposition needing 3 an over did the usual thing and punished the bad ball. Wayne suffered similarly and Flax Bourton accumulated happily. Alfie got a wicket and (I missed this) his victim headed for the clubhouse and smashed his bat to pieces. Thus earning the cider moment award.
I got a wicket, a classy catch by Reg, Nellie took a catch of Stroddy’s bowling. All in vain. Flax got the runs in 19 overs. So an early finish and time to go to the Plough for the last night of Kaz and Otam’s reign.
10 years they have served and suffered and new owners await. What will happen,? what will the new look pub be like? My local for 25 years.
We will have to wait and see.
Farewell Laurel and Hardy, welcome Little and Large?
Beaver Patrol? You had to be there!
All this is on the Q.T and strictly hush hush.
Cricket 912 – Friendly at Bradford 1in12 next Monday
Cowboys,
a reminder that we are committed to a friendly game away at Bradford 1in12 next Monday (June 4th: Jubilee parasite Bank Holiday).
Plan is to leave the Plough at 10am, for a 2pm start at Knaresborough Cricket Club, followed by an evening at the 1in12’s own bar, with a table football tournament. Our Bradford comrades have organized accommodation for us.
So, availability please. 1in12 have visited us for a game every season since we’ve been at Frenchay, so we owe them the return game. Innit.
cheers
DC1